What is this Telehealth Business?

What is this Telehealth Business?

What is Telehealth Counseling?

Telehealth has been called “distance counseling,” “telecounseling,” “virtual counseling,” “online therapy” and the like. We’re all talking about the same thing- counseling that happens virtually through a tech device. The American Counseling Association defines it as the following:

“Telebehavioral health, or distance counseling, is the use of a digital platform that provides secure, encrypted, audio-video conferencing to communicate with a client in real time.”

Since the arrival of the global pandemic we call COVID-19, you have probably seen more and more people transfer services to digital or virtual mediums. Counseling is no different. But lucky for us, telehealth counseling services have been around for decades (check out more about that on the International Conference on Computer Communications).

The Benefits of Telehealth Counseling

  • Convenience– You can have counseling from your house, office or even car (not moving of course!)- all in the comfort of gym shorts.
  • Saving time– You don’t have to drive to your counselor’s office, get stuck in traffic, or have to wait three lights to get through that busy intersection. Some even have their session during their lunch hour… not that I recommend that.
  • You’ve already got what you need– No need to purchase any new or fancy equipment. Chances are you already have a cellphone, computer or ipad- any of these will do.
  • Validity– Telehealth counseling with a professional is legit. Not only has it been around awhile but there are ethics and rights that protect you. Only secure platforms are used and privacy is still a priority.
  • Continuity of care– There is less chance of breaking the momentum of counseling. Car problems? Sick kiddo at home? Out of town conference? Counseling can still take place.

The Disadvantages of Telehealth Counseling

  • Bad connection– Although you’re connected virtually, you’re obviously disconnected physically. It can be hard to read nonverbal communication and sometimes slow internet speed can make things choppy. Boo.
  • Too “new school”– Technology can bring people together to communicate. While it has its perks, some feel it “gets in the way” of human connection. We get it- it can be kinda weird staring at a computer screen.
  • Issues with technology– “Can you hear me now?” “Can you see me?” “Can you repeat that?” “Your face is frozen.” “Let’s hang up and try again.” Potential phrases you or your counselor could say.

La Luz’s Stance on Telehealth

Telehealth isn’t our first option, but we’re glad it’s an option at all. Through the use of technology, we remained connected with clients despite global pandemics, unexpected family situations, and times kids throw up in the car on the way to school. It has helped to bring people together and has helped to provide hope and emotional support through technology, even when things seem bleak. Thank you Mr. Technology, we’re glad you’re here.

How to Deal with Sadness During the Winter Season #whysoglumchum

How to Deal with Sadness During the Winter Season #whysoglumchum

Not feeling the holiday spirit? Do the holidays have you feeling glum? If so, you’re not the only one. Did you know holidays have a tendency of making those who feel happy, happier? and those who feel sad, sadder?

Maybe you’re grieving a breakup, divorce, death of a loved one or even the diagnosis of a medical condition. Perhaps you fall into the category where the winter season causes you to feel more depressed or anxious. Whatever the case, I need you to know you’re not the only one.

If you fall into any of these categories, here are 6 things you can try to boost your spirit:

Volunteer– humans are social creatures so doing something with, around or for others in an act of service or fellowship can enhance connection. Community and service can give one a feeling of satisfaction, accomplishment and fulfillment.

Attitude of gratitude– Finding things to be thankful for can increase overall feelings of happiness while decreasing feelings of depression. You can shift your mental lens of seeing life as a joyful experience rather than disappointment. Think of three things you’re grateful for before you even get out of bed. Then dwell on these things throughout the day. Train your brain to be more appreciative.

Be in nature– over the holidays if you’re feeling disconnected from others, it’s important to feel connected to something. Take a walk in the park, watch the sun set or see what new birds may be in your area.

Include natural light– During the winter, daylight is shorter; with less sun, we use more artificial light which can throw our internal rhythms off.  So do your best to have natural light around you during the day. Light exposure can help regulate hormones and chemicals in your brain that affect your overall sleep and mood. So, if you work in a cubicle or windowless area, go outside during your break. When at home, open up curtains and blinds (not the actual windows) to let natural light inside.

Step out of routine– Do something you enjoy that you don’t normally do. Bring an air of excitement or unpredictability. Instead of watching a movie, read a book. Reach out to someone you haven’t spoken to in awhile. Clean out that junk drawer. Cook a new meal.

Have a Staycation– If you’re unable to meet or travel to see your loved ones, enjoy the city you’re in. When was the last time you went to the library or to the nearest farmers market? See what tourists enjoy doing in your area and do it!

If you’re feeling low during the holidays or wintertime, just know you’re not alone. Countless people feel discouraged or down during times they “should” feel otherwise. If there has been a common theme of anxiety or depression for some time, there are people who can help. Look up local counselors, therapists or emotional support groups- if you’re not sure where to start, send us an email and we would be happy to help you or point you in the right direction.

Marriage Advice #ido

Marriage Advice #ido

I recently took an informal poll (shout out, you know who you are!) to hear what tips for a budding marriage all those married, separated, or divorced out there had. While the population was diverse, there were clear themes of listening and communication, being best friends, having TONS of patience and something about not going to bed angry. The biggest discrepancy, however, was in managing finances- to have or not to have joint bank accounts, that is the question (in Shakespearean tone of voice). No wonder it ranks as one of the top topics for greatest fights within a relationship! Take a read for some of the advice given from dozens of people who have been married from weeks to decades!:

  • Always talk about your day, offer to help , never forget to tell him/her how much (s)he makes you feel better and special.
  • Never go to bed angry….and always remember to continue to date your spouse…
  • Forgive quickly.
  • It’s not always easy. Sometimes you have to CHOOSE to love. Marriage is a choice everyday to commit to that person. The minute you stop doing that you are headed for a rocky path.
  • Hangout for hours- talk, listen to music and just be together.
  • Dedicate yourself to being useful to the person you love.
  • Not every fight needs to be resolved. If it’s something petty there’s no need to hash it out, just agree to disagree. Make out like teenagers regularly. Keeps you young. (Christina Gonzales Polanco, San Antonio, TX).
  • Add humor to serious conversations when you’re at a crossroads
  • 123. 1. Own up, apologize even if it was unintended 2. Validate each others feelings 3. Try to learn from mistakes and vow to try not to make the mistake again.
  • Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s all small stuff.
  • Avoid being touchy or emotional.
  • Respect and love each other as equals. You’re partners.
  • Have a budget!
  • Listen and communicate.
  • Kiss hello and goodbye.
  • Don’t lie.
  • Pick your battles. It won’t always be “fair”, so agree to disagree and remain friends.
  • God, love, respect, trust.
  • Never deny making love unless both are not in agreement.
  • There is a solution to every problem. Be committed to finding that solution together as ONE.
  • Put God first above all else and he will bless your marriage!
  • Practice tolerance every day.
  • We can get caught up in kids, jobs, etc., but when all that goes away – you will only have one another.
  • When the little things start getting on your nerves, remember it was those same little things that made you fall in love.
  • Forgiveness is important, play, laugh be silly and always touch.
  • Pray together.
  • Never stop dating.
  • God first, then spouse, then kids.

Anything else you might add? Comment below!

5 love languages and Healthier Communication

5 love languages and Healthier Communication

By guest blogger: Lisa Arce, LPC

Have you found yourselves arguing more lately? Are you feeling disconnected, neglected or resentful?

Unfortunately for a lot of us, when we become angry at our spouse or partner we tend to shove it down, ignore it or not deal with it. Maybe we were taught to “pick your battles” or “it’s not worth getting angry about.” I call major BS on that. We need to tune into those emotions because that’s where growth lies. The 5 love languages allows us to understand what our spouse/partner needs from us. When we understand why we are fighting, we are in a better position to come up with a solution.

Here’s a look at what the 5 languages are:

  • Words of Affirmation: If this is your love language, words speak louder than actions. Hearing, “I love you,” is important—hearing the reasons behind that love is even more powerful.
  • Quality Time: To people with this love language, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical. Distractions or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
  • Receiving Gifts: The receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known and that you are cared for. It’s all about the thought behind the gift.
  • Acts of Service: Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Act of Service” person will speak wonders to them. The words he or she most wants to hear: “Let me do that for you.”
  • Physical Touch: A person whose primary language is physical touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love.

Beyond fighting less (or at least more productively), the concept of love languages is great for maintaining the relationship, too. Sometimes when we’ve been in a relationship for a long time, it’s easy to get complacent. When we know our partner’s love language, it’s incredibly easy to tune into what they may or may not need from us or heck ask for it ourselves! It’s like a cheat code for your relationship.

Meeting your partner’s needs for love is a choice we make each day. If we know each other’s primary love language then we can choose to speak it and help each other feel secure and happy in our relationship. But what if our partner’s love language does not come naturally to us?Well, so?? When an action doesn’t come naturally to us and we choose to intentionally do it then that is an even greater expression of intimacy. When we talk about connecting to our partner, we are speaking about choosing to lean into connection.

Overall, it all comes down to knowing what’s important to people so that you can understand, empathize, and work with them a little better. Everyone is different. We all have different life experiences; we come from different backgrounds. It makes sense that we communicate differently, too. Now don’t get me wrong, the 5 love languages can’t fix everything. They’re not going to magically make problems go away. But the concept does go a long way in communicating and connecting better, and we all know how much that matters in a relationship.

Relationships need to be maintained and healthy relationships take work. If you need help with communicating and connecting better, send me an email at: nlisaarce89@gmail.com! I am ready to help you have healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

P.S. Did you know this love language business works with kids too? Try it out and let us know how it goes!

What to Say when your Kid Says This #whentolisten #whentoignore

What to Say when your Kid Says This #whentolisten #whentoignore

Below is a list of common complaints you are likely to hear your child say, especially if they are into their teen or tween years. Although you are likely pretty sharp on knowing your kid, below is a list of statements that are some common we may find ourselves discounting them. In some instances, ignoring as a parenting tactic is a good thing. However, there are times when children say something, we need to listen up!

“You never let me do anything!”

Welcome to one of many childhood explosions! Chances are you let your child do TONS of things. A few things are likely to be going on here: they are upset, are attempting to hit you where it hurts, and it has become clear there is a communication breakdown. At this point, it is likely your child, and perhaps you, are feeling a lot of emotion.

Now is not the time to try the rational and logical route, because it’s likely not to work (yet). Give them a few minutes. From there, revisit this topic. Your child needs to know a couple of things:

  • they are always free to share their opinions or feelings.
  • they are not allowed to be disrespectful to others [or to themselves].
  • You are willing to hear them out.

Then empathize with their feeling: “I can understand how you could feel different from the rest of the group because you’re the only one who [can’t go eat after the dance]“, attempt to compromise (when able) “I’d be ok with you grabbing dinner with them another day,” and remember you are the parent and they are the child “but staying out after 11pm is out of the question.” What mom or dad says is the law.

“I don’t want to go to school.”

Sounds like a typical expression, and quite honestly, I think we’re all notorious for saying responses like: “Well I don’t want to go to work today but I still am,” “It’s called responsibility,” or “I don’t care.” Ask yourself a few questions. Is this the first time your are hearing your child say this? Is this typical behavior? Could there be something going on? Do they say this before school or after school? Is your child pending a big test or project? Are they only saying this on certain days? How did they sleep the night before? Take a look at the context of these statements.  The answers to these questions could give you the insight you need to be able to judge when to ignore or when to listen.

“(S)he makes me feel creepy.”

Listen up. Ask more questions. What do you mean by creepy?,” “Have they ever done or said anything to make you feel uncomfortable?,” “Do you know who they are?,” etc. Err on the side of caution. While we want our kids to be polite, intuition/gut feeling can go a long way. Kids are incredibly perceptive and may be picking up on something before we do. In situations like this, your supervision can go a long way. Sometimes this means actually keeping eyes on your child when this person is around. In cases where your child is in a different location, find the “adult in charge” and touch base with them. Also, follow up with your child and do some quick practice scenarios What would you do if they got into your space and it makes you uncomfortable? Encourage them to create distance by taking a step back, create a nonverbal barrier by picking up an arm or hand [in a non-aggressive way], and commit to strong eye contact with this person when stating “Please step back.” Also encourage them to always know the nearest exit and to have a buddy go with them behind closed doors when with this person. Lastly, validate. Let them know you are glad they told you how they were feeling and they can always trust you to share when they’re “not feeling right” about something.

“I’m Tired.”

Unless your kid is trying to get out of an undesirable chore, listen. Here’s what the National Sleep Foundation had to say:

  • Preschoolers (3-5): Sleep range widened by one hour to 10-13 hours
  • School age children (6-13): Sleep range widened by one hour to 9-11 hours
  • Teenagers (14-17): Sleep range widened by one hour to 8-10 hours

Unfortunately, children aren’t getting enough hours of sleep and tend to fall into the minimum number of sleep recommended for their age. Remember, the time your child actually goes to bed, is likely not the time they are actually going to sleep- big difference. Throw in a growth spurt and sporting practice and they need even more sleep- your child may need to fall closer to the middle and maximum number of sleep recommended. They aren’t going to like the adjusted bed time, but they’ll appreciate it in the morning.

“Can I go over to [person you don’t know]s house?”

No. All together now, “No.” They will proceed to rave how you never let them do anything- if they’re teens, you may hear how unfair you are and how So-and-So’s mom/dad let’s them. You would proceed to tell them I don’t know that person, but he/she is welcome to come over here after I’ve talked with their parents so that I can get to know them. Get their number tomorrow at school so I can call them. Your child will likely not back down easily, and that’s ok. Being angry or frustrated is normal, but remember disrespect is not. My parents did a great job making our house-THE house to be at. We had newly released DVDs (rented), junk food, and the tastiest meals (shout out mom!). We had enough space to feel independent, and enough check-ins for my parents to have an idea of what was going on. Make your house the IT house.